What else?

You know how everything will always go wrong with me? When I'm excited about something and looking forward to it, either something bad would happen or something good. When I'm anticipating the day to come, either something horrible will happen that'll prevent me from going, or something so good I never expected will happen.

It's normal for me of think of every bad thing that could happen and every good thing that can happen. When the day comes, it just does and I can't do anything to change it. It completely sucks when the bad thing happens. And it'll be totally awesome if the good thing happens.

So, with Doulos, I really don't know what will happen. I'm so scared. What if I end up not going? Ugh...

I know. Everything goes according to God's plan. But still... I think too much la! How can I stop it when it's something I do so naturally.

I need help.