Thursday, June 28, 2007

What is Jasmine like?

I want to write something. But I don't know what. I need to write something. Inspiration is pulsing. No title yet. Don't know what to write about. All I know is that it's gonna be something I'll be able to read next time and remember. What is Jasmine like? Should that be my topic? I'll try.

1991. I'm two! 1997? My friend
Jasmine is a girl. Though sometimes I wanna be a boy, just because it seems easier at times. The first thing people notice about me is my height. Really. I go for a party and my friends helps me ask this guy what he noticed about me. First thing is "That freakishly tall girl ah?" I'm not freakishly tall la. You can say too tall but not freakishly. Don't worry. I'm not a monster. I LOVE my height. I wish i can grow some more. I have jet black hair which I love. Though sometimes I wish it were brownish like my friend. But in the end, I''ll still end up loving my black black hair. (Don't ask why I'm talking about hair. I'm gonna be talking about lots. In fact, I'm gonna put in What is Jasmine like as my title) The only part of my face I think is unique are my eyes. (I know what you're thinking. Spare me la. I'm trying to see who I am) My teeth are horrible, which is why I resorted to braces. Lack of "funds" have led me to the government clinic which is cheaper in cash and quality. I've had it on for almost 2 years now and it doesn't seem like I'm getting it off for another year. Sucks. I can't wait for it to come off. When some people have their braces on, you don't normally notice it as much. Unfortunately, when I smile, my teeth loves to expose itself. Genes are something you can't change. It's what God has made you. Unfortunately for me both my parents don't have the "high metabolism rate" gene. Which is why you have a somewhat 'large" person writing this post. Can't complain. Only can work hard at not becoming dad =P I like the name Jasmine. Jasmyn would have been nicer, but imagine.
"What's your name miss?"
"My name is Jasmyn"
"Okay." *writes jasmine
"Sorry, it's spelled j-a-s-m-y-n"
I'd have to do this every time. I might just as well wear a name tag around. I love my sir name too! It's rareeee. And some people think I'm mixed.

2004. PS 2005. Maybelle

Enough about my physical appearance. What about intellectual? I'll give it a shot.

Let see. I can't say I'm a genius. And I can't say I'm stupid either. What I do know for sure is that I'm slow. I can process information well. But it's darn slow. Which is why when it comes to Math. I suck. English, I can handle because I can process all the information the book is giving me. I wish and pray that I'd stop being so careless! I've lost soo many 100%'s because of it. Another thing I am is lazy. I won't do my work unless it is absolutely necessary. Fortunately, I have this impulse thing which keeps me on track. Impulse by my definition is something like doing things completely on impulse. If I plan something out, it's not likely to happen.(or at least go my way) but when I don't, things go the best. Weird, I know, but I'm thankful it happens though sometimes I wish I could plan things ahead and not worry if it'll smack me in the face.

2006. Summer 2007. Jays

I don't consider myself an emotional person. If someone has done something horrible to me, I'd get angry at that moment. Very angry. And then after awhile of ranting(doesn't normally work) or calming myself(that works better), I'd treat that person like nothings happen. The feelings I felt before when I was angry disappear. Sometimes I wish I could continue being angry. Which is why I often say "why do I still talk to/help/trust him/her" At times I consider myself too soft and naive. Then again, if I held on to my resentment, I'd be missing out on alot in life.
If you were to observe me from afar(or, if I were to observe me from afar) I'd come across as weird and loud and lame. I won't be on your list of "people to meet". Actually, come to think of it, I have different personalities. One which is truly me and the other, a self concious me. When I'm around people I'm familiar with, The real Jasmine reveals herself. The loud weird Jasmine. But when I'm with people I feel intimidated by, I'd either get so self concious I embarrass myself or I just shut up. (Most of the time, I'd end up embarrassing myself) I like being me. Alot! Sometime my jokes and comments are soo lame people think they're too weird =) But I like it. The crazy side of me is nice. But the other side of me I like too. The side where somehow, I can somewhat figure out how to teach people. In anything! Dance, singing, studying etcetc. I may come off as a know-it-all at times, but now that I'm older, I've able to control myself. To be safe, I first make sure the person I'm teaching is willing or in the case of GB girls, "forced" to learn. The weird thing is that even though I can teach, sometime I myself can't do it right. For example, I managed to help a friend dance properly. But when I did it, I sucked. Which is why sometimeees, I avoid doing the things I teach. Weird. I know( if you think this is wrong, tell me. Please. I need advices.)
Spiritually, I'm a Christian. I've made that clear already, but, like other Christians, I'm still growing. I want to have a relationship with God. A good strong one. One that is spirit filled. A relationship with the Creator of the world. How can that go wrong? I mentioned before that when I plan things out, it doesn't happen. Only when I leave it. Then things'll be amazing. Different Christians have different "anchors". For me, the thing that applies to me the most is that everything happens for a reason and it's not my will but God's. It has taught me soo many things and I've gone by life so far learning it. I've starting having devotion in the morning recently and I pray that I'd continue. Life is not easy. Not at my age and I know it's going to get harder. God, I need You.
So, that's the Jasmine I can give you. I may sound like an egoistic idiot. Sorry la. Blogging has proven useful. I was reading my old emo-like post and it has sort of reminded me of stuff. Someday, this post'll come in handy. Seriously, please comment or tell me if you disagree on anything or if you see something I should correct in my life. I do wanna learn.
Hey, this is my first post with pictures!!

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Right I am(or is it was?) screw english!

Wee! Damn, I'm sooo lousy at this. Sheeeesh. And I thought I could actually be consistent.(stupid jasmine)
Anyway, my titile refers to the face that I was right about me not having anything interesting to blog about even if I wanted to write a daily thing. My life is such a bore... I'm still in school even though I'm eighteen, I can't drive, I'm addicted to SCRABBLE(I know! Gosh, I'm such a loser. Well, at least I'm good at it =P), and I've got a piano exam coming up!
Bloody hell. It's 3.30am Sunday morning(why is it that I only blog during the wee hours of the morning?) and my exam is on Monday. I'm not prepared, and I just might srew it up AGAIN! If I do fail again this time, I'm gonna jump of a cliff!
I wanna stay home tomorrow(or rather today) like a good girl(good. ya right!) and practice!! So, I don't know if I should go for Cheer. Wanted to go watch my dear(blur) friend shana perform in Charm, now it seems like shes not performing anymore. Plus, it doesn't look like I'll have anyone to go with(ya la! I'm a loser okay!). I'll just decide tomorrow la! when I wake up(thats if I wake up in time).
Damn, it's almost four. I better sleep...

I know, this post sucks(it's my blog! not that anyone's reading it *crosses fingers*) but at least it's a post. This blog is sooooo picture deprived! I actually have pictures from my trip to camerons, but that'll have to wait till the next time I stay up in the weeeeeeee hour of a night. Btw, I hate Math and I miss History.

Just incase I disappear again, UPDATE LA JASMINE!!(trust me, it works)